Beer And Sex

There’s car sex, wedding night sex, breakup sex, makeup sex, straight sex, gay sex, kinky sex, and the list goes on and on, especially if you’ve got a good imagination. But one type of sex that is woefully overlooked is the fantastically pleasurable, sometimes mind-blowing, and perhaps even good for you "beer sex." Having sex and drinking beer are two of the most gratifying activities in life, and some may argue it’s not just the latter that’s necessary for the survival of our species, but the two in tandem. As a certified sex therapist who works with couples that have great and not so great sex, I can’t argue. So, what is it about beer that’s so awesome for sex, and which types lead to the best sex ever?  

Let’s start with the facts. Studies have shown that beer is good for you-ish. Dark beers in particular contain probiotics, which help with digestive health. They also have B vitamins for increased energy, as well as iron, a nutrient that assists with healthy circulation. You can see where I’m coming from here: you feel spry and nimble, have stamina for days, and there’s excellent blood flow to all the right places. A 2015 Italian research study even suggested that daily beer drinkers have more stamina than their non-beer drinking counterparts, and are 31 percent less likely to have heart disease or suffer strokes. Fantastic, but I think there’s a definite tipping point in the research, as well as the practical results. A few beers can certainly diminish sensitivity and help men last longer, but too much is, well, too much. Who hasn’t been there? I never recommend moderation to my clients when it comes to sexual pleasure, but beer is a different story. It’s important to have clear goggles on when that point in the night arrives to decide whether you’re going to have more great beers or great sex. Both aren’t likely.

Next, let’s look at taste. Beer and sex are both somatic (body-based) experiences, so my recommendation is to go with your gut. The only constant in sex is variety, meaning not many people like to do it the same way all the time. From my position, beer should be the same way. Humans crave novelty. With so many types of people and beer—blonds, darks, ambers, light, heavy, effervescent, dense—why choose one?  Of course, we all have our favorites, which in sex therapy terms is called our sexual template. Our sexual template is like the blueprint of our sex lives, and it’s one of my favorite topics to explore with individuals and couples. We go deep into the process of what turns you on and why, and how that positively or negatively impacts your sex life. I can only imagine the revelations when examining a beer template. Why do you like what you like? And, better yet, how can you have what you like while having sex how you like? Heaven, I think.
 
Similarly to when you’re saddling up to the bar, knowing what you like helps you order with confidence. In the same way, direct communication is key to great sex, not just in expressing your preferences, but in asking your partner about theirs. In my clinical practice, I come from a place of sex positivity, which means all sex is good sex as long as it’s consensual and pleasurable. I’m hoping we are moving into a time and place culturally and societally where everyone is on board with this. So, if you know you like blonds and reverse cowgirl, let your partner know. But be open to their beer and sex inclinations, too. A stout and snow angel, or a porter and the hot seat (look them up) could be about to revolutionize your palette and positional repertoire.
 
I wish I could say, “In my experience, drinking beer XYZ leads to the best sex ever.” Unfortunately I can’t. Beer and sex are too subjective, which keeps my jobs and beer drinkers' lives very, very interesting. What I can say is pleasure begets pleasure and sex begets sex. The more you have, the more you want. Enjoy what you like in the bar, the bedroom and beyond.

I’d love to connect! If you have any specific beer sex tips, please find me on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter as @DrHollyRichmond.

Dr. Holly Richmond is a Somatic Psychologist, Licensed Marriage / Family Therapist and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist.